The disappointments keep coming...

I was sooo excited when I woke up this morning. I was going to spend a little time in the sun with Tony then shower and get ready to head over to the in laws to get the car ready then off to the track.

Yet again the car is not ready. Apparently now there's a crack in one of the springs. Okay, so shit happens. It's better not to risk it. Then Ian told me that his dad said the trailor wasn't fixed yet either. What the fuck?! He's known since the beginning of the season (over a month) that it needed to be fixed. Last weekend he told us that come hell or high water we'd be on the track this weekend. Which means he'd have had the stupid trailor fixed by now. At this rate I'll be surprised if we get the track out at all this year.

One of the things that really sucks about this is I've taken every race weekend off to be able to pit for dad. Ian's work is really slow now, he's getting about half the houses he usually does and it's really really bad on our pocketbook. So I sit and think about this and I'm just like...I took off work for this? Don't get me wrong, I'm in retail, a weekend off is a rare rare occasion. I'm enjoying the time home, but right now I really need that money. Ian's talking about only going to Wisconsin for a week instead of two and I'm not okay with that. I can't short my time with my family.

I know with all my down blogs lately I must seem like the most negative person ever, but I'm not. Truly. It's just been a rough month and this kind of was the cherry on the ice cream. I've always envied Ian his relationship with his father because I never had much of one with mine. And generally when Paul said he was going to do something he did it. When my dad says he's going to do something you know he'll come up with an excuse a week later. He's not even going to show up for my brother's wedding. That's how fucking reliable my father is. And to some of you I'm sure, you really can't see what significance this race car is to me as I don't drive it and don't have a glorious position in the pit....but it's the first thing that made me feel part of the family. So for him to keep flaking on it and making excuses it just reminds me far too much of my dad. And I have no tolerance for my father's excuses, so I have no tolerance for Paul's. I'm just getting sick of the consistent disappointments.