Saturday, October 31, 2009


Okay not so doomed. Here I was thinking...seriously...that I'd end up coming home 20-30 lbs heavier. The scale was nice to me. I only gained 5.2 lbs over the last three weeks. Don't ask me how, because I really don't deserve such a pretty number! Maybe it was all the alcohol that ate the food in my system to keep me from gaining it all back?

Here's a couple pics of good times!

Other than mama drama I had a great trip! I really did not want to leave at all. I missed Hubby....but home is home. He needs to move back home with me. I miss everyone already, and I hate tearful goodbyes. Of course I just couldn't avoid some of them. I always feel like a piece of me is missing when I leave. Ugh. I hate it.

Tonight we celebrate, Tony's trick or treating with Hubby, the little man is going as Iron Man. I have a party with girlfriend, of course we have to dress up. I found this cute little referee dress with knee socks and whistle to book. Pictures to come! If I don't look like a cow, of course. :P

Friday, October 30, 2009

Back to concrete not so heaven

Hey all! I've survived (though barely), these goodbyes are becoming harder and harder to withstand.

I've got oooodles of pics to upload to my facebook still (FB is being a cocksucker), and I plan on posting a few for y'all to enjoy as well! Tomorrow is my first WI since getting home...dun dun duuuuuuuuun. Yup. We'll see how that shit goes. I'll do up a blog with some pics and the doom that is my weight.

I'll also start reading and commenting again. I did peruse while gone, a bit when I had the time, but didn't comment too much. It's time to get myself back to the grind and I need each and every one of you to support as well has receive support from. I've found this whole blogging thing doesn't work for me if I don't give as much or more than I get.

Hope this finds everyone well!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


Ok now don't get me wrong, I've been eating like a pig in perpetual PMS mode, however, I knew that was coming.

Here's my thing...

My cousin is trying to lose weight. Or says she is trying. That she wants to. She wants a baby and thinks she needs to lose at minimum 40 lbs before her body becomes a less hostile environment. She has PCOS, her hubby had a reversal vasectomy, all kinds of fertility issues. Add being obese on her end, thyroid problems on isn't a pretty picture.

Since I've gotten here I've almost felt like Jim gets defensive of Jenny because I've lost "so much" weight. He said they've tried EVERYTHING and nothing works. I said that maybe they didn't give it long enough...he said no, it's just that nothing works. Period.

Now, I've lived with these guys before. I know how they eat, what they eat, I get it. I was just like them once. They do not have good eating habits at all. Jim doesn't eat breakfast or lunch then pounds it back at dinner and through the night. Jenny swears Jim sabotages her, and you know what? He does. I've seen it. Now I know he just wants to make sure she's fed and happy, but she's thinking he's scared that if she gets all skinny she's going to leave him, because he doesn't think he deserves to be loved.

Either way, here are a few examples of sabotage.

Halloween's coming....I got here on the 8th...they've got three giant size bags of candy and a huge cauldron full as well already. Tell ya what, they'll have to get more before Halloween.

Jenny wanted a corndog for lunch, I wanted a couple tater tots, so Jim headed to the store to get the supplies and came back with that and tons more. Including two containers of donut holes....for breakfast. One is nearly gone.

He asked how many corn dogs we wanted...I said one, he brought me two. So of course I ate them. Then he brings out the tater tots and scooped me some, asked if I wanted more, I said no he'd given me way more than enough, so he tossed another scoop on. Yup. Cuz that's what I wanted right. I didn't finish them to say the least.

I'm sure I'm going home 30 lbs heavier. No really, cuz that's how Wisconsonites roll. Tell ya what, this won't be happening again.

I went to the gym yesterday with a girlfriend, after our hour workout we walked across the street to the bar. Yup. We're going to the gym tomorrow too.

Oi...I'm in trouble y'all. I'm going to need some major support when I get home because as easy as I KNOW it will be to get back to normal eating (I'm already greased out), I'm going to be way more hungry than normal.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Week One

Today marks one week back home in Wisconsin. I'm almost positive I've gained 10 lbs already. I have two more weeks here! The biggest problem I have is the food here is so good, no really, Wisconsin cheese, Funyuns, Coco Puffs, Easy Cheese and crackers. Deep fried tasty deliciousness. You have no idea. It's not even just the food, it's the fact that it's there man. Just there, so accessible. I'm not eating because I'm hungry, I'm eating because it's there. How sick is that shit? I keep telling myself that I need to get my shit together and calm my eating down or I really will destroy everything I've done.

Honestly though, I don't really feel that bad. I know that the minute I land in Edmonton it's going to be over. I know the way I eat at home isn't going to change so all this crap I'm gaining here is going to melt off, but it's still a very very bad step back. I should feel guilty, I should feel stupid and horrible. I don't. How wrong does that make me?

I haven't taken a picture yet. Not one! I want to get my son and nephew together at a couple parks and the pumpkin patch for pics. I think I'll be taking some of my crew at the bar this weekend. Maybe I'll get a nice pic of my sexy Harley boots for Tammy!

Hope you're all well

Monday, October 5, 2009

If I seem like I disappeared...

For those of you that care, I truly do apologize. I don't even really know where my head is at the moment. Currently I'm trying to remember everything I need to have packed for my trip to WI on Thursday. Damn just remembered my birth control!

So I'm going to be pretty invisible until I settle in at the house in WI. I'm figuring earliest would be Friday. I'll attempt to get on here before then and try and read and comment, but I'm tellin ya now, chances are I will be missing TONS of blogs out there, sorry guys!

Until then, I'll leave you with a few of my favorite pics from the awesomeness that was my weekend in the mountains!

You can't see one, and these than you can are uber blurry, but it's hard to catch elk on the cam at 6 am when it's still dark! These ladies were sitting right outside our room!

I may be layered in long johns, a waffle shirt, hoodie, jeans, etc...but yup, still fat. Le sigh.